Building Strong Families

Strong families are defined as having positive beliefs and values, appropriate rules and boundaries, the ability to adapt, and good communication. This is true for any type of family, including grandparents who are parenting their grandchildren.

Beliefs and values

Sharing similar values unites and strengthens the family. Although values may differ among families, strong families are similar in that they share time together, have a commitment to each other, and take a positive outlook, even in challenging situations.

Time together

When you make time together a priority, you show that you appreciate your grandchildren. Family time can be as simple as reading to your grandchildren or playing with them outside. Creating family traditions such as making Sunday-morning breakfasts together, or taking evening walks, or celebrating holidays and birthdays, are all ways of spending time together. Other activities you can enjoy together are sharing hobbies, participating in outdoor activities, and playing board games. Taking part in activities together creates lasting memories and strengthens bonds between family members.

Commitment

Family members who are committed to one another are able to keep promises and support one another through rough times. Commitment takes time and effort to build. You can't expect it to blossom overnight. However, by sticking with a difficult family situation even when it seems hopeless, you can begin to develop this family value.

Positive outlook

There's no doubt that during tough times it is sometimes difficult to be optimistic. As the family leader you can help your family find something positive in every situation and build a stronger family in the process.
One way of building a positive outlook is through remaining hopeful and focusing on the positive strengths of each family member. For example, you can share with your grandchildren all the things they did well that day. Another way of building a positive outlook is to avoid a way of thinking that expects that your grandchildren ought to, should, or must behave a certain way. When you accept your grandchildren for who they are and where they are developmentally, rather than who you think they should be, you are able to avoid negative thinking that leads to a negative outlook. If you can be a good example of positive thinking, your family is more likely to develop a positive outlook, too.

Source: IFAS Extension, University of Florida